Stress in the Family

This is going to be a stressful topic is it not? 😉 Oh stress, I have such a love-hate relationship with you. Sometimes you are good for me and help me get my homework done (like this blog, cough, cough. Just kidding!) If only getting rid of stress was as easy as writing a breakup letter (those are not easy to write from what I have heard.). If I were to tell stress that I am breaking up with him, then this is what my letter would say:

Dear Stress,

You help me prioritize and accomplish the things that are most important. I am grateful for those times that we have had together. However, there are sometimes when you are not very helpful. You can be a bad influence on me. When you are around me too much, I transition from being concentrated to overwhelmed and hopeless. I crash and burn. And were you there for me? No! Did you help me feel better? No, you did not! You would make things worse! So, I am breaking up with you! You are only allowed to visit me for under an hour each day and Sundays are off limits. However, you can visit me more often during finals week each semester.

Peacefully,

Emily

 

Stress can sometimes be helpful. It can aide us in getting things done. Over the years, I have realized that I write best when I have a little bit of a time crunch (not when I have less than an hour to write a 3-page essay). However, sometimes too much stress can be detrimental.

Ways to Cope with Stress

Coping Strategies
Less Effective:	More Effective:
Denial Avoidance Scapegoating	Taking responsibility for your actions Affirm family and self-worth Balance self-concern and concern for others Reframing (have a different perspective) Using Available Resources -Community -Religious

I got this list from my textbook.

I am sure that we can all think of different ways to cope with stress. One of the first things that pops into my head is tv shows or movies where women eat ice cream when they are sad. The next thing that I think of is Poe from Kung Fu Panda. I admit that I sometimes eat when I am stressed. It is not the best coping strategy. This chart shows different kinds of ways that we can handle stressful events.

 

In the short term, it is sometimes okay to avoid or deny what happened. In some situations, those feelings can help you function until you are at a place where you can mourn and accept the stressful events. If you avoid or deny the problem for a long time, then you probably need some extra help. Stressful events can affect family members differently.

 

For example, my little brother, he loves this isolation (he is an introvert). My mom liked it, but she wished that she could occasionally get out of the house more. It did not bother my dad too much. He did not like working from home though. And I died socially. COVID-19 has been really hard for me. I was out of state when everyone was getting scared about COVID. When I left for my trip life was totally normal. When I came back home, it was as if my world was turned upside down. I had to stay in my house almost all day. I could not go to Church, give people hugs or tap dance with my friends. I love people so much; I need to be around others. On April 4^th,  I had lost all hope. I felt like this was NEVER going to end. I was in a dark place. Then my dad gave me a blessing. In it, he told me to hold on to hope, to focus on others and help them find happiness and hope. I wish that I could say that the next day I was skipping around the house bursting with hope. I was not. It was a slow process, like the rising of the sun. Gradually, bit by bit I had more hope that someday life would be better. Now I am much more hopeful, but some days are still hard.

What are some of your coping strategies? Have you used any that my textbook has listed? What has your COVID-19 experience been like?

Keep on dancing!!

💙

Emily